I saw Rush (the band, not the pseudo-pundit) with my best friend at the Los Angeles Forum back in 1979. My friend drew the band's trademark red star logo (sans naked man with gripping butt cheeks) on the left breast of a pair of heavy cotton hooded warm-up pullovers popular in those days with night time Huntington Beach-goers. I still have mine, and it fits if I try hard.We scored our front-row, center tickets from a Ticketmaster booth next to Anaheim Stadium for a mere $80.00. Sure, it ate into our Asteroids and Defender budgets, but it was way worth it for such awesome seats, dude.
We rolled in, red stars prominently displayed, found our seats and were soon embracing a bra-less hottie (er, "fox," to use era-correct parlance) with her own homemade T-shirt sporting the words, "Neil Peart: Achiving Balance." We didn't really care that she couldn't spell "achieving" and were disappointed when ticket-checkers discovered she may have simply been jiggling and hugging her way to the front row with no more authorization than her breasts could muster. In our book, that was pretty substantial authorization. My friend and I both agreed she deserved to stay a little longer for her efforts.
After Geddy, Alex, and Neil played for us, I felt complete. I couldn't aural direction-find for a week; my deafness was a battle-scar: "Sorry man, I can't hear you very well, I had front-row seats to RUSH in LA last WEEKEND. FRONT-ROW."
Yes indeed, chicks dig eardrum scars.
Sadly, I only went to one other Rush concert after that: Wembley Arena, London, 1982, lame seats, no pre-show breasts, no 7-day aural disorientation. Since then, I've wanted to see Rush in concert and I missed their last gig when they came through town. In fact, I purposely missed it because I was a weak, tired, middle-aged old dude.
Lame, lame, lame.
Now I find that the mightiest epic-rock-power-trio ever to grace a Dungeons and Dragons gaming session is rolling back through town on their Snakes and Arrows tour. I know, as sure as my 8:30 PM bedtime, that I need to see Geddy's hipster goatee up close, count the hairs and wonder if "Just for Men" gets his business. I need to (carefully) bang my head and play unabashed air guitar/drums/bass to whatever the hell the boys want to play. I need to wail along with Geddy, "Earthshine/a beacon in the night/I can raise my eyes to Earthshine" and watch Neil hammer tight and clean through another set.
Bring me up front, Tickemaster, plant my ears in the 4KHz killzone.
Sure, for $740.00.
What! Is that the inflation-adjusted 80 bucks of my youth?
Adjusted for inflation, my 1979 tickets would run me $156. 80 today. Not too bad, I could probaby get the wife drunk and convince her that spending $627.00 for the whole family to get their eardrums pasted was a good deal. As long as I didn't mention bra-less, half-educated hotties willing to snuggle for a seat I'd probably be golden.
So what's going on here? If we leave out the fact that I now automatically count admission to anything that costs money in sets of four and look for "family pack" discounts, something seems terribly wrong. Is there some sort of conspiracy to jack up the price so aging guys can't live out their rather hum-drum rock and roll fantasies? I don't think so. I think it's simply supply and demand, ram 'em when you can capitalism. I suppose I shouldn't complain, The Police are coming and ear-bleed tickets for their gig in my town are running $3,750.
It looks like I'll have to buy cheap seats, pull on something sexy, and work my way to the front.
7 comments:
Besides something sexy, you'll also need some dipilatory cream, facial electrolysis, natural hair extensions, manicure, pedicure, vocal chord tightening, adam's apple deconstruction, breast augmentation (a Wonder bra with prosthetics might suffice), professionally applied makeup and a class in gender-transformation-aesthetics(i.e., hip swaying, lip pooching, complementary coquettish affectation). Oh, and don't forget the duct tape!
740$?!?!
Thats like 3 carpayments... well, almost.
For 740$ you should get to be a roadie for a week, they should feed you, and give you a place to sleep... sorta like space camp.
Please post photos afterward; I must see the "sexy" something!
P.S. - Are you sharing this with your students?
I must look into what it would take to make me a foxy female, perhaps I should take my mid-life crisis all the way with full-blown gender-reassignment.
Sebastian, I love the idea. How about "Rush Camp" or, "Bare Naked Ladies" camp. Either would do just fine.
SR, my students are wrapped around MySpace. I use a variety of on-line sources and materials in my lessons and it is becoming obvious rather quickly that most of them are completely unfamiliar with any form of thoughtful commentary or rational discourse. That's fine since one of the big lessons of high school is the slow discovery of their own voice and its place in the adult world.
I am not intentionally keeping my blog from them nor am I urging them to find it either. I did read a variation of my "Round for the House" blog to show them how to include material that might get them in trouble in a way that doesn't focus on the drunkenness or debauchery but rather on a greater, more universal human theme of change and awareness. In addition, I share most of myself quite openly with my students because I urge them to share themselves, their voices, their hopes, their pain, and their triumphs with me and with their peers in a way that moves beyond the superficial and into something meaningful.
Cheers and thanks for the comments,
krhys
-groans- Dad! You spelled Barenaked Ladies wrong! And please, for the love of...of...of...Neil Peart, don't get a sex change.
Not for another year at least.
x.x I've already seen enough "sexy" to scar me for life.
Oddly enough, I search for tickets in groups of four. But I don't search for family discounts. Hm.
^.^ They should have "Orlando Bloom" camp - even if it's just a dozen look-alikes.
(<3 Fifleaona has left her teenage scar on your blog comments -nodnod-
P.S. I'm not dressing up sexy to shake what little I've got just so you can have us go deaf for a week.
Thanks.)
Where's Lori when I need her to explain my stray and unimportant musings?
My innocent question pertained more to the sharing of your interest in RUSH (as well as your past concert going) with your students, NOT if you are sharing this blog with them...
Until I can figure out how to write something seemingly less "provocative" I'll just be reading, thank you very much...
You're fine SR, your musings are far from unimportant. Besides, you should know by now that I take the grand soapbox whenever I get the chance. Lori is there to help me out and usually says something like, I don't think that's what she meant." Followed by an unstated, "Moron."
Cheerio,
krhys
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